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Law Firms and Lawyer Jokes, Part 1

As of 8/14/13, a simple query for “personal injury lawyer joke” brought up just over a million results.  Ouch.  Why are there so many lawyer jokes?  Why are there so many lawyers? Why does it seem like all the lawyers do Phoenix auto accidents?   How do I find the right Phoenix personal injury lawyer? Why so many tough questions? 

Why are there so many lawyers doing Phoenix auto accident and injury cases?

Money!  Typically attorneys take a percentage of the money they recover for you as their fee, usually between 25% and 40%.  Yes, 40%. The more money they recover for you, the more money they make (hence the 40%).  Some injury firms run a volume practice handling many cases at any given time. These firms can offer reduced rates and take in hundreds of cases at a time.  Because of the volume, they don’t necessarily need to worry about recovering the maximum value for each case.  I’m not saying they don’t, they just don’t need to worry about it (from a business perspective).  On the other hand, there are smaller firms that usually take larger cases, take a larger fee, and pursue each and every dollar. However, the larger the case, often the more expensive it is to fully litigate it and these firms need to be more selective (again, from a business perspective). 

Do you really need a lawyer?

Negotiating against the insurance company without professional support is an awful idea for many reasons.  The most compelling one is that what you say can and will be used against you.  Your lawyer speaks on your behalf and has much wider latitude when negotiating with the insurance company and other lawyers.  Second, you want a trial attorney.  Every personal injury case has the potential of winding up in court where a jury decides how much money, if any, you receive.  Trial experience is extremely important and your personal injury attorney should be very familiar and comfortable with the courtroom and litigation process. 

Choose a firm with a commitment of personalized attention:

Because there are so many options when choosing an attorney, you need to be very careful you pick the right one.  Personalized attention is a must.  You need a firm that will assign the right attorney to your case for the entire caseParalegals and other office staff play an important role but when you hire a law firm, you should have the same attorney work your case from start to finish, know your first and last name (not kidding), and build a relationship with you during the course of your case. 

Why so many lawyer jokes?

Here is one of our favorites:  How many personal injury attorneys does it take to change a light bulb?  Three:  One to turn the bulb, one to shake him off the ladder, and the third to sue the ladder company.   Ouch!

Personal injury attorneys must have done something along the way to deserve the harassment.  Most of the critique comes from the lawyer chasing down an ambulance, overstating the client’s case, and doing anything they can to make some fast cash.  Other jokes address lawyers lack of communication, little effort, and willingness to sue at the drop of a hat if they smell the slightest bit of money.  Each lawyer and law firm is different, some fit square in the middle of a good joke, and others are far from it.  The moral of the story is that you need to take your time when choosing your lawyer, they come in all shapes and sizes and no single firm is right for everybody.

Bottom Line:  Think about what you want from your personal injury law firm.  Do you need marble floors and high rise offices?  Do you need a firm who has funny advertisements?  Do you need a firm that has after hour appointments and can cater to your schedule?  Do you need full case delivery?  Do you need a firm where you meet the partner at the first meeting?  Do you need to shake hands with your attorney from the start and feel you can fully trust them?

All jokes aside, this is your case and you have many options on how to get the most out of it, we advise you to find a firm that really fits well with you. When it is all said and done, you shouldn't walk away with a new joke to submit to Google. 

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